Jeff Miller, a.k.a. Masturtater, was born in a legendary flying city and raised in Florida of the USA. At one time he was employed by the US government to work on a secret project at a highly classified military base somewhere in the middle of a desert - no more can be revealed. During his tenure with the government Masturtater was involved in an accident where his head became hopelessly wedged in a top secret trash can (see sketch). The trash can was surgically removed, but Masturtater will suffer the rest of his life with bad hair, due to contamination by alien residue that was in the trash can at the time of his devastating accident (see photograph). 

Now Masturtater writes short fiction. He also creates art when he feels like it, which is pretty often, and plays the guitar - very shittily. He likes heavy Metal, and obsesses on Iron Maiden, and binaural beat music. He is not retarded, he just looks like it. If you see him on the street, give him money - please.